Proof of a Place (new song!)

Keeping hope alive on the cosmic struggle bus

Like a lot of shell-shocked humans in this modern hellscape, I often find myself looking around reality with an anxious mix of both terror and rage.

There are so many beautiful things to this existence—ice cream, sunsets, hugs, Drag Race, weird lil’ mushrooms just vibing in the woods, etc…

But there are so many terrible things as well. War, loss, grief, sadness, loneliness, despair.

I don’t know why things are this way.

I don’t really trust people who say they do know why things are this way.

Me when someone says “everything happens for a reason.”

Sassiness aside, there’s a part of me that wants to believe that our ride on this cosmic tour bus of humanity is going somewhere good—that we’ll see some epic vistas along the way, that the trip will be worth all the unplanned pitstops, that we’ll end the journey full of awe and gratitude for all we’ve experienced.

Sometimes I feel like I need to let go of knowing 100% for sure the answers, and just keep my heart and eyes open for evidence that life’s not a total scam.

Recently, I’ve had a lot of friends lose loved ones. What a weird way we phrase it, huh? “Lose,” as if it’s a misplaced set of car keys and not the aching absence of an intimate human bond.

Sitting with these friends in their grief, I’ve been thinking a lot lately about death, what I think comes after, what I hope I’ll hope for when faced with the “losing.”

I wrote a song about that, and here it is. (PS Click through to Youtube for full lyrics and a probably bad pre-song insurance commercial.)

For anyone that’s experienced loss lately, I’m holding space for you.

Love,

Annie B.

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THREE GOOD THINGS

1. I’m in love with this woman yelling strident encouragement at me. The vacuuming the taxidermy deer while outside???? Amazing. She is so many parts sage and unhinged and I am heeeeere for it.

2. Have you been wanting to give to others in grief? Recently a few friends have gone through some super difficult stuff. But they’re not alone in the world, they have us! So if you want to support Dustin or Tiffany, click on their names, my little love bugs.

3. I recently discovered this life hack and now I can’t shut up about it. LENTILS IN OATMEAL FOR BREAKFAST! I know it sounds absurdonkulous, but trust me. You won’t taste the lentils and you’ll get extra protein, you smart and healthy genius!